Home to a Haven

Faith-Filled Encouragement for Homemakers

  • Home
  • About
  • House & Home
    • Haven Creation
    • Homemaking
    • Cleaning
  • Spiritual Growth
  • Hilary’s Books

How to Spark Joy In Your Home

Hilary March 14, 2019

Stuck in a quarantine? Now's the perfect time to create a haven!

Stuck in a quarantine? Now's the perfect time to create a haven!

Want to spark joy in your home? Forget about your stuff and start focusing on people!

Two children hold lit sparklers

Woman holds two lit sparklers

If you’ve been following the Marie Kondo bandwagon, sparking joy is nothing new to you.

But if you’re new to the KonMari method of cleaning, organizer Marie Kondo teaches others to remove anything from their homes that doesn’t spark joy.  

Through her books, television shows and online videos, Kondo walks with clients through the decluttering and purging process, making sure that absolutely every item – from pencils to purses to pillows – sparks joy.

While I’m not as stringent as Kondo – some things I know I need to keep, even if they don’t add obvious joy to my life – I’ve adopted a simple 2 question test for decluttering my own home:

  1. Do I love this?
  2. Do I need this?

If I don’t love or need it, I get it out of my house and pass it along to someone else. My decluttering criteria is missing joy, though – mainly because of a big question I have: Can your belongings truly spark joy?

Seeking fulfillment in things?

I’ve always had a lot of belongings. With a mom who loves to shop, I learned a lot of her habits. Furnishing my home has never been too much of a stress because I always have a lot of things to choose from. And when I feel stuck and need a little something to add to a room, I scour clearance sections and secondhand stores to find interesting additions.

Over the years, I’ve made sure to keep belongings that I love and pass along anything else. Because of this, when I walk into a room in my home, I smile because it’s filled with many of my favorite things.

(Want to create a haven? This is a fantastic first step – keep and use your favorite things.)

But as much as I appreciate and enjoy my favorite belongings, do I believe they spark joy?

Not at all.

Quite frankly, I don’t believe stuff can fulfill the deep longings of our hearts. And belongings can never create joy.

Because they’re just things. Things might bring passing satisfaction and even a whole lot of glee. But joy? Joy’s something so much deeper and richer.
“Quite frankly, I don’t believe stuff can fulfill the deep longings of our hearts. And belongings can never create joy. Because they’re just things. ... Things might bring passing satisfaction and even a whole lot of glee. But joy? Joy’s something so much deeper and richer.” - Hilary Bernstein, HomeToAHaven.com

Joy, defined

You may think I’m being a little too nit-picky with my choice of words, but I think there truly is a difference between happiness (a state of satisfaction and contentment) and joy (experiencing great pleasure or delight).

Belongings definitely can add some happiness to your day and some cheer to your home. And on the flip side, holding onto things that bring bad memories or that you’ve never liked can certainly spark a lot of negative feelings.

But do you typically experience great pleasure and delight when you see your belongings? Maybe sometimes … but most likely not.

Because stuff truly doesn’t satisfy, does this mean you’re doomed to a home without joy? Definitely not.

The good news is that joy is a deeper inner quality.  It’s a fruit of the Holy Spirit that naturally comes from your life if and when you’re living for Christ.

How you really CAN spark joy

It IS possible to spark joy in your home, but it looks a lot different than what Marie Kondo teaches.

Instead of looking to belongings to add to or subtract from your home, think about what you can do to add joy to the people in your home.

  • How can your kind words add joy to your husband’s day?
  • By spending 15 minutes alone with your son – playing a game or sitting down for a cup of hot chocolate and a thoughtful conversation – can you spark joy in his life?
  • If you listen to what your daughter’s been processing and jump in with a hug instead of a bunch of “I told you so’s,” will you add a bit of joy to her day?
  • When you spend some time preparing tonight’s dinner, add in a couple of side dishes and dessert, and set the table nicely, could you create a joyful dinnertime that will refresh your family after a long day?
  • How could serving your family through household chores add joy to their days? Will they appreciate having a clean pair of their favorite pants? Would they smile when they open the fridge and see some of their favorite snacks to munch on?

You know your family best. And as you study your husband and children, keep track of some of their favorite things, then surprise them with their favorites.

By taking the time to do thoughtful deeds or to speak loving words, you’ll fill your relationships – and your home – with joy.

That kind of joy – the true, deep down joy found in a soul – is what truly matters. It’s the kind of joy that can make a difference in a person’s life. Treating all who enter your home with a selfless love and kindness is the most certain way to spark joy.
Hand holds a lit sparkler

How do you spark joy in your home? What do you do to make the people in your home feel special?

Disclosure: Links in this post may be affiliate links. This means that, at no added cost to you, I may make a commission on products purchased through these links. Thank you for supporting this website!

All images courtesy of Deposit Photos.

  • Author
  • Recent Posts
Hilary
Hilary
Hilary Bernstein is a Christ follower, wife, homeschooling mama, and writer who believes every Christian woman can transform her home into a haven. She's happiest when she's hosting friends and family for dinner, going on date nights with her husband, singing along to the radio while driving her kids around, enjoying live performances, relaxing on family vacations at the beach, and spending cozy family nights at home.The author of several books, Hilary loves to encourage her e-mail subscribers!
Hilary
Latest posts by Hilary (see all)
  • Why Kindness Is The Most Important Thing to Add to Your Home - January 14, 2021
  • The Best Strategy for Decluttering Your Home - January 10, 2021
  • 4 Simple Steps to Getting Your Home in Order - October 29, 2020
Please share!
fb-share-icon
Tweet
fb-share-icon

Related posts:

Why Havens Are Important (and How You Can Get One)
The Only Way You’ll Find a True Haven
7 Things to Add to Your Living Room to Create a Haven

Filed Under: Haven Creation 1 Comment

« Why Havens Are Important (and How You Can Get One)
Rescue Your Messy Home with a Homemaking Reset Day »

About Hilary

Hilary Bernstein is a Christ follower, wife, homeschooling mama, and writer who believes every Christian woman can transform her home into a haven. She's happiest when she's hosting friends and family for dinner, going on date nights with her husband, singing along to the radio while driving her kids around, enjoying live performances, relaxing on family vacations at the beach, and spending cozy family nights at home. The author of several books, Hilary loves to encourage her e-mail subscribers!

Lovely comments

  1. Amy Mathis says

    June 18, 2019 at 10:34 pm

    I love this! I so agree, but hadn’t totally put it all together in my thoughts yet! We are getting ready to move and I really need to purge our belongings. I’ve been pretty focused on what “things” will make us happy in our new home. Such a good reminder as I go through our things and make a new home.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Hi! I'm Hilary! Click here to learn more about me ... and Home to a Haven.

I believe you can find peace and purpose when you care for your home and family. I'm here to guide you with faith-filled encouragement!

Categories

Spiritual Growth

Woman whisks eggs
Mom and daughter shop for coats
Wish you had peace in your home? It's not as impossible as you may think.
If you're a Christian, it's essential that you know how to let the Holy Spirit lead your life.

More Posts

House & Home

Woman sits with planner and cup of coffee
Without motivation, all of your best intentions will only stay intentions. But with motivation, those intentions transform your to-do list into a done list.
You can decorate your home, even on a tight budget. Here are six tricks to try in your home ...
You may put so much time into caring for your home. But what if a clean home doesn't matter?
Stay-at-home moms, have you ever wondered what to do before your husband gets home?

More Posts

Popular Posts

If you’d like to actually create a haven in your home, here are some powerful secrets on how to do it!
Woman smiles as she cleans a countertop
Woman washes countertop
With so many major problems in the world, it might surprise you that you can use your haven to change the world.
Longing for a haven is natural. The good news is it IS possible to find the haven you long for.
Creating a haven can seem so difficult if you don't know where to begin. There's an incredibly important secret to creating a haven, though!

More Posts

  • Blog
  • About
  • Start Here
  • Contact
  • Hilary’s Books
  • Privacy Policy
  • Join the Community
© 2021 HilaryBernstein.com. Custom site by Moonsteam Design.
Home to a Haven uses cookies to ensure that you get the best experience on this website. OK!